With tongue planted firmly in cheek...

So now Jerry Brown's a force to be reckoned with in the Presidential race. Well, I for one am not about to forget the record of our "flakiest" native son!

First and worst, he built-up a surplus in the California state budget -- a sin neither of his Republican successors can be accused of. How irresponsible can one man get?!

And who can forget how he delayed aerial-spraying vs. the Medfly over populated areas until the last public-health and environmental-impact reports were completed? That's sick!

He put more women, Latinos, African Americans, and gays into higher positions of power than any other rich and powerful, straight, white Gentile guy ever. A discredit to his race!

He tried to fight crime and poverty not only by putting more cops on the street but also by founding the California Conservation Corps and becoming the first contemporary politician in the national spotlight to stress education as of primary importance. What a dunce!

He took the unpopular stand of actively opposing the death penalty, on "personal moral grounds". That's obscene!

He chose to live in a modest apartment and drive his old car instead of living in a luxurious new Governor's Mansion donated by political cronies and maintained at taxpayer expense. The man's priorities are all screwed up!

And after leaving office, did he make speeches for millions or lobby for our international competitors, as is the fashion? No way! This weirdo spent years contemplating "Zen" riddles of human truth and justice and working with Mother Theresa in the slums of Calcutta. What arrogance!

Yep. There's no doubt about it -- the worst thing that could happen to America is for "Governor Moonbeam" to become "President Moonbeam". Why, he's even got plans to make taxes and health care more simple and affordable and to develop alternatives to nuclear power and foreign oil! Hopeless, ain't he?